Yasmina's staircase

Friday, December 8th 2017

Trinidad and Habana, Cuba

It’s 7:30am and we are gathering for Darnel’s amazing coffee before our 8am departure to Habana. Once we all have coffee in hand, Darnel and I go over our bill for the mini bar. We drank all of the beer and most of the soda. Our bill comes out to 12 CUCs. 

By 7:55am, Yusmani, our driver, is knocking on the door. By 7:59 we are on our way. The car ride is long and I spend most of it watching Netflix on my iPad. At one point, Yusmani pulls over to pee on the side of the road. While we are waiting patiently, a police officer approaches our parked car. Oh crap, we quickly nominate Laura to talk and roll down the window. Laura manages to sputter out something to the effect of "bano de la naturaleza", which translates to "nature's toilet". Soon Yusmani comes running back to the car and we all laugh. 

At the halfway point we meet up with Hickli again and switch into his boat of a car. Andrew sits up front and explains that we need a place to stay in Habana. Hickli is all business and it's taken care of in 5 minutes flat.

Eventually, we arrive at our casa particular in Habana. Hickli asks if we want to look around first and we all get the feeling that we should. We enter into a shell of a building and into another building inside of it. We are led up a marble staircase, which is significantly tilted to one side. 

Hickli introduces us to Yasmina, who shows us the first room. The ceiling is low, but there is an AC unit and lots of space. She says that she needs to clean the second room, but shows it to us anyways. There are toys and clothes strewn everywhere. This is clearly a child’s room and I feel terrible about taking it. None of us are sure what to do, but we are uncomfortable refusing the house so we just smile and nod.  

Yasmina asks if we want coffee and I automatically say yes and then immediately regret my decision. It takes 20 minutes to make the coffee and the boiling water is raising the temperature in the whole apartment.

Once we’ve fully displaced Yasmina and her son, we head into town for lunch. We pick the first restaurant that we see (they are all starting to taste the same anyways).

After lunch, we walk to our old neighborhood to visit the shopping square that Pablo showed us on our first day. First things first, we all buy a few bottles of rum. Next Laura and Andrew go into the the cigar shop. There is conflicting information on how many cigars you can bring back to the US. I sit outside while Laura and Andrew figure everything out. I feel like I should be buying more cigars, but, honestly, I just don't want them.  

Next, we walk slowly back to our house while looking for tshirts. I am surprised by the lack of souvenirs in Habana. Eventually I find a t-shirt and canvas bag; I successfully negotiate the price down by 5 CUCs. It's our last day in Cuba and I am finally getting the hang of things!

Once we drop our stuff off, it is getting to be late afternoon and we have nothing left to do. We find a table on the front porch of a large water-facing bar and start to peruse their extremely complicated drink menu. When the server finally arrives he explains that they only have mojitos. Alright, tres mojitos!

20 minutes later, we see our server walking towards the bar carrying a large bag of ice on his back. I think to myself that I don’t even want ice but am gracious when our drinks finally arrive. Around 8pm, we decide to walk over to La Buena Vista Social Club. We we arrive it comes to light that (A) tickets are 80 CUCs each and (B) there are no tickets left. We ask if we can sit in the bar for appetizers and drinks and they oblige. 

This place is pretty cool, but compared to everything else, it is grossly overpriced. I end up ordering a sangria and we all split an appetizer. We have a nice time and decide to head back to our side of town for dinner. By the time we get there, it’s late. We pick the first restaurant we see. The service is slow and we finish 2 rounds beer before we get our food. Somewhere amidst fatigue, dehydration and Yasmina’s tilted staircase, I get the idea that nothing in Habana is structurally sound, including our current balcony. I study the balconies on the building across the street intently. I am sure that our table is going to crash down to street-level any minute.  

After surviving dinner, we make the short walk back to our casa particular. Upon approach of our titled marble staircase we all quietly take out our phones for pictures. For the last time, we ascend the staircase. 

I have officially met my limit for crumbling infrastructure and overcooked meat and I am glad this is our last night in Cuba. 

When I enter my room, it is only partially cleaned. I think that I will never fall asleep, but I am out the second my head hits the pillow. 

Rum, coconuts and ice cream

Thursday, December 7th 2017

Trinidad, Cuba

It’s 9am EDT and I am waking up for our last full day in Trinidad. After driving across the country and hiking through the rain forest I am feeling like we have finally earned our beach day! My spirits are high as I bound into the courtyard for breakfast. Eventually, I am joined by a tired Andrew and a sick Laura. Laura looks and sounds markedly worse than yesterday. I really feel bad for her but secretly hope that she’ll come to the beach anyways. 

Darnel serves us another exceptional breakfast, while we ponder the day. As soon as we are done eating, Laura announces that she will not be leaving the house and I totally understand. Oh well, this is my chance to bond with Andrew! We take about 30 minutes to get ready and then reconvene in the living room. 

Previously we had discussed riding bicycles, but given the heat, we decide it would be better to take a cab. Getting a cab is easy, even with our extremely limited skills in Spanish. The ride out to the beach is about 20 minutes. The road is narrow and covered in direct sunlight. I am happy we are not on bikes. 

Soon we arrive at Playa Ancon. Our driver says that he’ll wait for us and we try to negotiate a time. He says it doesn’t matter and to just come find him when we are ready to leave. I think this is an inefficient way to run a taxi business, but I keep that thought to myself. 

First things first, we take a few minutes to walk the length of the beach. It’s mostly empty and the sand is fine and almost white. The water is warm and bright blue. The beach is interspersed with little hut shaped bars and small sailboats offering snorkeling tours. I vote for a snorkeling tour and Andrew seconds the motion. We go and talk to one of the sailboat guys he tells us to go check into a small hut up the beach. We are instructed to leave all of our stuff in the hut. We are both uncomfortable with this, but end up doing it anyways. Eventually, it’s time to leave and we awkwardly climb onto the tiny sailboat with a small group of other tourists. 

Our guide takes us about 50 feet out into the ocean and then provides each of us with goggles and a snorkel. We hop into the water and spend the next 30 minutes swimming around. The water is really warm, which is nice, but my goggles are enormous and keep filling up with water. In between emptying my goggles, I see lots of tropical fish and coral. When it’s time to head back, I am a little relieved. 

Back on dry land, I announce my mission to drink rum from a coconut. We walk up to a hut bar and do not see the coconut drink on the menu. They take our order for regular drinks and then explain that the seating at the tables are for hotel guests and that we have to go sit on the sand. 

Right when we sit down, a guy selling coconut drinks approaches us. We tell him that we just ordered from the bar. He says that he’ll come back later and instructs us to buy from him and not the bar. I agree. His coconuts look awesome. 

Soon our bar drinks are delivered and we are officially on beach vacation! We stare at the ocean and talk about our time in Cuba. At one point a tall Australian woman approaches us and asks if we have plans for dinner. We tell her no and she hands us a smudged up business card from the restaurant where she ate last night. She says that it’s really good and that we should go. I put the card in my bag. This is so random. 

Eventually our drinks run dry. I look around, but our coconut guy is nowhere in sight. I get up to go look for him but end up walking back to the hut bar. Even though they do not have coconut drinks on the menu, I tell them that I want one and they agree to make it (it’s starting to seem like menus really don't matter here). 

Man, this drink is strong. Inevitably, our old guy returns and I cleverly hide my drink from the hut bar. I almost sneak it past him but he sees the straw poking out from underneath my towel. He points at my drink and laughs hysterically. I can’t help but laugh too. Cubans have a way of laughing at you and with you at the same time. 

Around 1pm we are ready to go check in with Laura. We approach the parking lot full of cab drivers and our original driver emerges from the crowd. He drives us back to our house for the same rate. Logistics are surprisingly easy here.

When get back to the house, Laura is sitting in front of the AC. Her room is at least 40 degree cooler than outside and she still looks very sick. She agrees to look for restaurants for lunch, while Andrew and I get ready. After about 20 minutes we reconvene in the courtyard. Laura has found a restaurant in her guidebook with confirmed air conditioning and we unanimously agree this is a good idea. 

At the San Jose restaurant we are seated immediately. Our table is receiving adequate air flow and we are within line of sight of a TV playing soap operas. We are trying hard not to stare at the TV, but we are tired and running out of conversation. We start out with a round of El Presidents. After 8 days in the Cuban heat we are slowly coming around to idea of light beer. When it’s time to order I opt for fried plantains and a pork chop. I am drunk, famished and overly excited for lunch.

We all enjoy our long lunch and once we are done, we head over to the main square to buy souvenirs. I end up with a t-shirt and a handful of cigars. On the way back we stop at an open air market. I spot an art gallery and we duck in to take a look around. The art looks original and the smaller pieces are reasonably priced. I take about 20 minutes to pick out 2 small paintings of roosters. I attempt to negotiate on price, but end up paying the sticker price. Oh well, I now own Cuban art! Yay!

After shopping, it’s still hot outside and we all agree that a siesta is in order. Around 5pm, Andrew and I decide to take a walk around the newer part of Trinidad and check out Parque Central Cespedes. When we arrive, there are a handful of municipal buildings and a group of teenagers accessing wifi on their phones. Yep, we’ve pretty much seen all of Trinidad.  

We walk back to the house and around 6pm we are ready for dinner. Andrew tells the story about the tall Australian and her restaurant recommendation; Laura agrees that we have to go there. 

By 6:15 we are being seated at Taberna Don Madeley. The restaurant is completely empty. Our server is very friendly and recommends 5 different cocktails. We are overwhelmed and order the first one that she mentioned (they are all different combinations of rum, lime and sugar anyways). Our meal ends up being very tasty. I have to give Cuba credit for having extremely good service in every single restaurant. It’s the kind of place where there are at least 3 servers per table and you can just think about what you want and someone will bring it to you. 

After dinner we walk over to a little ice cream store for dessert. Laura has been contemplating ice cream since we arrived in Trinidad. This is her coconut drink. 

After dinner we decide to make the most of our last night in Trinidad. Laura is still sick, but we resolve to make a lap around the main square to see if anything is happening. In this moment, I truly love my very sick friend.

We spot a rooftop bar with live music. We climb up two flights of steps and a small ladder to get to the roof and then we have practically walk through the band to get to a table. Once we are seated, we settle on a round of canchancharas. The band is awesome and does a great job of playing just loud enough. We lounge around Paladar El Criollo for the rest of the evening. The music is good, the breeze is cool and there’s just the right amount of rum in my cocktail. 

Around 11pm we call it a night and head back to our house. On the way back Andrew sprains his ankle and I immediately feel great empathy due to my great-sprain in 2016 in New York. He hobbles back to the house like a champ and we are all asleep way before midnight.

Tomorrow is our last full day in Cuba. I like it here but I am also getting tired of rice and humidity. 

The communist hospital hotel

Wednesday, December 6th 2017

Trinidad, Cuba

It’s 9am EDT and I am waking up for our first full day in Trinidad. By 9:25 we are all gathered in the courtyard for our 9:30am breakfast. At 9:26 Darnel materializes from our kitchen with a plate of fruit and toast. Wait a minute, how did he get in there?

The entire breakfast spread includes scrambled eggs, cheese, meat, toast, fruit and a plate of breakfast sandwiches. To top things off, Darnel brings us a large thermos filled with piping hot coffee. This breakfast is amazing!

As soon as Darnel leaves, Laura announces that she may be getting sick. I feel bad for her, today is the most active day of entire trip. She says that she still wants to hike and I am happy that she is going to power through. After breakfast we take a few minutes to pack up for our day hike. 

By 10am our driver, Johnny, is waiting outside in his green and white classic Ford from 1957. He even has a small Cuban flag attached to the hood! Johnny is tall with a head full of hair gel. His t-shirt is way too tight and I feel like he could drive us right into to set of Grease. I really like this guy. 

Johnny will be showing us around Topes de Collantes today, which is a nature reserve, located about 30 minutes outside of Trinidad. Andrew takes the front seat and Laura and I hop into the biggest backseat I have ever seen in my life. Everything about today is awesome. 

The drive out of town is nice. The car is incredibly loud, so no one has to stress about making small talk in Spanish. Once we get to the nature reserve we start driving uphill. The engine is whining as the car slows to a crawl. At one point, we pull over next to a small group of guys with buckets on the side of the road. They quickly surround the car and add water to the engine. They are all very friendly with Johnny and I find the camaraderie charming. 

Eventually we make it to a lookout point. We have to walk up a few flights of steps and on way up we pass by a vendor selling bananas (I take note this is the 3rd Cuban we have encountered who is selling stuff on stairs). At the top, the view is very impressive. We can see the ocean and everything in between is a dark shade of green. 

Once we rejoin Johnny, he drives us the rest of the way to the trailhead for a short hike down to Salto del Caburni. The entire hike is 3 miles, roundtrip, and Johnny will be waiting for us when we’re done. We start out walking down a paved road, which passes by some very brightly colored houses and the remains of 2 story concrete building. There is also an abandoned hospital that has been converted into a hotel. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something about that building feels very communist. We also pass several vendors who are selling bandanas and water. 

When we finally hit the trail, it starts out flat and easy. As we progress the air becomes increasingly humid and is filled with bugs. The path is mostly downhill, but we are still drenched in sweat. Laura is starting to cough more and blow her nose. This can not be comfortable. 

Eventually, we make it to the bottom of the hill and are rewarded with a beautiful waterfall and a little river running past it. We take a quick break and some European tourists take pictures of us. I am not looking forward to hiking back up that hill, but it has to be done. We make pretty good time coming back up. It’s incredibly hot and we are covered in a thick past of sunscreen, bug spray and sweat. We all keep our heads down and focus on getting out of this rain forest. 

I am relieved when we finally break out of the woods and back onto the sun drenched concrete road. Laura thinks this is the worst part, but I silently disagree. After we get to the top and before we hit line of sight with Johnny, we take a break under a tree. We are trying to dry off before getting back in the car. It doesn’t work, and, eventually, we apologetically climb back into the car. 

The drive back is nice as the cool breeze blows through the car windows. On the way back into town we have to stop at a checkpoint; everything goes smoothly. When we arrive at the house, we unanimously decide it’s time for a siesta and agree to meet up at 4pm for some of our refrigerator-beer and an early dinner. 

At 4pm I am finally cooled down and wander into the kitchen for my beverage. I sit in the courtyard and read for a few minutes before Andrew joins me. Eventually Laura drags herself outside as well. I notice a random staircase going up the back of our courtyard and decide to go explore. The staircase goes onto our roof, which has a clothesline and furniture. It also connects to our neighbor's roof on the left and the house behind us. I make note of this for later, when the sun is gone. 

Around 5pm we are getting hungry and opt for dinner at Taberna La Bojita. The dining room is set up like an old beer hall and the menu has all sorts of creative tapas. Even though multiple fans are blowing directly on us, we are already beginning to sweat to again. We order a round of cold beer and then start exploring the menu. We end up with an eclectic mix of shrimp skewers, pizza, olives, cheese and french fries. The food is delicious and we eat every bite. 

After dinner we look for somewhere cool to sit and listen to music. We try to find somewhere new, but end up back at La Casa de La Cerveza. We grab a table in the corner and a round of El Presidentes. There is an old dog sleeping in the middle of the dance floor. 

As the sun sets, the atmosphere becomes more lively and we become more energetic. Around 9pm we decide to head back to our rooftop and enjoy a night cap. The cool night air is extra breezy and we get a nice view of the neighborhood. We have a couple of rounds of rum and drunkenly talk about communism and until we are no longer making any sense. I am having fun and we are probably staying up later than we should. Around midnight we are all stumbling off to bed. Tomorrow is our beach day and I have been looking forward to it since we arrived!

Would you like a guide in English?

Tuesday, December 5th 2017

Habana, Cuba and Trinidad, Cuba

It’s 6:30am EDT and I am waking up after my first good night of sleep in Cuba. It’s early, but I barely notice since I went to sleep at 9pm. I quickly get ready for the day and finish packing up for our trip to Trinidad. At 7am, I meet up with Laura and Andrew for attempt #2 at accessing Cuba’s wifi. We walk a block over to the closest hot spot and easily access the Internet. It only takes a few minutes to pull up our check in instructions for our next Airbnb. It tells us to call a local number upon arrival. Ugh; this is annoying. We speculate that our driver will have a cell.

We make a quick pass by several cafes, but none of them are open yet. When we get back to the Airbnb, Manny is waiting with a small pot of coffee. I could hug him right now. 

By 7:25am our driver, Hickli is waiting for us outside. He is driving a maroon Volga and his shirt is at least two sizes too small. Andrew offers to sit in the front seat again and Laura and I take him up on it. The backseat of this car is unbelievably comfortable. Hickli is polite to us, but he is all business. Once we hit the road, his cell phone is ringing every 5 minutes. He answers each call with a curt “dime” (which translates to “tell me”) and is talking a mile a minute. The entire drive is going to be 4 hours. Within 10 minutes my shoes are off and my iPad is out.

About two and half hours into our drive Hickli pulls over in a dirt parking lot and tells us to get out and take our bags. I was unprepared for this stop and am frantically trying to get my shoes back on. We think that we are switching cars, but it’s not clear. Once we are out of the car Hickli introduces us to his brother, who is named Yusmani. We are switching cars (whew). Hickli explains why several times, but we don’t understand. We quickly pile into Yusmani’s Volkswagen to continue our journey. Yusmani is a lot nicer than his brother, but his car is definitely smaller. 

After another 2 hours on the road, we arrive in Trinidad. Andrew gives Yusmani the address of our Airbnb but he can not seem to find it. We drive around the narrow cobblestone roads of Trinidad while Yusmani talks to all of the pedestrians. Finally, we find the house. When he pulls over, Laura asks if he can call our host for us. Yusmani dials the phone number and then hands the phone to Laura. She manages to explain that we have arrived and our host promises to come right over.

Just as Yusmani is finished unloading our bags, we are greeted by Darnel, our next host. Darnel quickly shows us into our house for the next 3 nights. We have the entire place to ourselves and it’s totally awesome. There are 2 bedrooms, each with their own bathrooms, a large living room, a kitchen, which is stocked with beer and Coke, and a small outdoor courtyard. We set up breakfast service with Darnel and also ask if he can help us find a driver to go to Topes de Collantes tomorrow. He says that he’ll have someone over by 10am. I am slowly getting used to booking activities in the absence of Yelp reviews.

Once Darnel leaves, we only take a few minutes to settle in. It’s nearly 12:30 and we are ready for lunch. The main square is a few blocks from our house and we walk in that direction. It is definitely hot in Trinidad. We pass a plethora of restaurants, but they all look the same. Eventually we settle on a place called Shango. We enter through large stone arches into a dining room with 20 foot walls on all sides and no roof. The restaurant is mostly empty and we all huddle together in a sliver of shade. Our server turns on several fans and points them all at our table. 

I order coffee and a sandwich and our food takes nearly 30 minutes to arrive. It’s okay though, we are just happy to be out of the car. After a long lunch we wander over to Plaza Mayor, which is the main square. Each side of the square has some version of a museum. After a quick lap, we unanimously vote for a visit to the museum of architecture. The entrance fee is one CUC each and the woman at the front desk asks us if we would like a guide in English. We all shrug yes and she says that she’ll be right back. After a few minutes she emerges from the back room with another women that will our “guide in English”. Oh well, maybe we’ll learn something! 

Our guide walks us through several rooms. The museum is laid out like an old house. She points out different kinds of windows, keys and door knockers. Inside is mostly marble and the temperature is substantially cooler than outside. Next we are shown to the courtyard, which is located behind the house. Our guide points out that the main kitchen was traditionally located outside and also shows us a replica of a very old shower that looks like a steampunk art project. The entire tour is over in about 30 minutes. We provide a small tip for our “guide in English” as she retreats to the back room. 

Next we stop in a few stores surrounding the square. I note the best place to buy bottled water and we all vow to return for souvenirs in the next two days. 

Next we go to Covento de San Francisco de Asis, which houses a small tower that boasts the best view of Trinidad. When we arrive, we learn this is also a museum of natural history. We pay our entry fee of 3 CUCs each and then we pay 2 extra CUCs so that we can take pictures. We immediately find the stairs to the tower. They are incredibly narrow and there is not enough room to pass by anyone traveling in the opposite direction. Luckily the stairwell is empty as we slowly climb to the top. After a few flights of steps we find a small gift shop in a room off to the side. We continue our climb only to find a smaller, presumably more exclusive, gift shop a few more flights up. Eventually we get to the last set of steps, which is actually a ladder. Once we’re at the top we are greeted with an amazing view and nice breeze. We take turns taking pictures of each other and looking over Trinidad and into the valley surrounding it. Eventually we head back down the treacherous steps. We take a few minutes to look around the museum of natural history. The captions are only in Spanish and, honestly, it’s not super interesting. 

Now that we have officially toured the city center, we decide it’s okay to find somewhere to sit and order some cold beer. We start out at La Casa de Musica, which is a small group of bars and restaurants situated on a large hill, which has been terraced into 5 different levels. We go to the top terrace and try to order Bucaneros, but they have ran out. We have to settle for Cristal and I am grumpy about it. 

After one round of drinks we decide to move on to La Casa de la Cerveza, which is a large, outdoor beer garden, surrounded by collapsed walls from a previous structure. They do not have Bucanero either, so we end up ordering El Presidentes. The bar is just crowded enough to be lively and the tall walls, which surround the garden provide nice shade. We end up hanging out for a few rounds. As the sun starts to set, we head back to our house to change for dinner. 

For dinner, we opt for a place called Paladar Sol Y Son. Our pre-trip research showed this is the best restaurant in Trinidad. We are worried that we may not get in, but decide to try anyways. When we arrive, we are seated immediately. Most of the dining room is situated in a cobblestone courtyard that is sprinkled with old statues and fountains. The ambiance is very nice. I start out with a sangria and end up ordering some version of pork and rice. The food is good, but the ambiance is really making the meal for me. 

After dinner we walk back over to the main square. We are not sure where to go, so we order a round of beer from a street vendor and sit on the lowest terrace at Casa de la Musica. A few teenagers are running around, but, otherwise, there is not much going on. 

Around 10:30pm we are pretty tired and head back to our house for the night. Tomorrow we have plans to hike and I am already scared of the humidity. Oh well, off to bed! 

Excuse me miss, would you like a cab or a boyfriend?

Monday, December 4th 2017
Valle de Vinales, Cuba and Habana, Cuba

It’s 9am EDT and the sun is beaming through my window and into my face. I am still wearing the same clothes from last night and I find my travel purse underneath my pillow. My room key is laying on the floor in front of my door. Ugh, I still feel drunk.

We have a full two hours before we leave to go back to Habana. I start my day with an extra long shower and a full liter of bottled water. By 9:30am I decide to go and knock on Laura and Andrew’s door. I wait a full five minutes before Andrew comes shuffling outside in his pajamas. I can hear Laura grumbling in the background. I ask if they are interested in joining me for breakfast and they agree to meet me at the cafe in 30 minutes.

I head up to the cafe to enjoy the morning sun and get a head start on coffee. Just as I am getting settled in, Andrew arrives early (this is by far the most punctual vacation I have ever been on!). He explains that Laura would rather sleep than eat and I totally get that. We quickly order breakfast and have a good long laugh about the sloppiness of last night. We are all in pain and are happy that we can spend most of our day napping in a car.

After breakfast Andrew has to head back to his room to pack up. We still have about half an hour to kill, so I opt for quick walk down main street and additional cup of coffee. The main street of Vinales is a series of brightly colored, house-shaped cafes and stores, most of which have large colonial-style front porches. The sun is extra bright and I see the same shirtless guy from yesterday working on his car in the middle of the street. I am extra charmed by Vinales in this moment.

I find a bright blue coffee shop on the way back where I duck in for a second americano. My feeling of still being drunk is starting to fade into a good old fashioned hangover. On the way back to my room multiple cabs stop and ask me if I want a ride. When I say no thank you to one driver he asks if I want a boyfriend instead; these Cubans are really relationship-focused.

When I get back to our rooms, Bruno is waiting out front in his Volvo. I quickly realize that he was one of the drivers who offered me a ride on Main Street and immediately feel embarrassed. When we make eye contact he laughs heartily. As soon as Laura and Andrew join us, Bruno launches into the story about how I didn’t recognize him earlier. He gets so much joy from telling the story that I have to smile.

Eventually, we start the drive back and Andrew takes the front seat. The car ride is quiet and I watch some Netflix on my iPad. About halfway to Habana Bruno pulls over to pick up another passenger. He tells Andrew that he can stay in the front seat, but Andrew voluntary moves to the back. A young girl takes his place and her and Bruno chat enthusiastically the rest of the way back.

By the time we arrive at Leyanis and Manny’s, it’s nearly 3pm. We quickly check in with Manny who is overjoyed to see us. We ask him to help us get a driver to Trinidad for tomorrow morning and he happily obliges. We also agree on coffee service for tomorrow morning, but no hot breakfast.

Now that we are settled in, we decide that today is the perfect day to eat street pizza. We go on a mission to find a pizza window and after, what seems like forever, we finally find one. The place looks a little grimey, but we are feeling adventurous. Laura and Andrew order little pizzas and I get a Cuban sandwich. We eat our lunch standing on the side of the road and are done in 5 minutes flat.

Next we decide to take a break at the coffee shop next to our Airbnb. We sit at a table outside and each order different variations of coffee with milk. I am still feeling adventurous and order something called a bon bon, which turns out to be coffee layered with condensed milk and foam. It’s an attractive-looking drink, but the condensed milk is too sweet for me. We spend our time updating the group travel journal, which is really just Andrew’s journal that Laura and I are co-opting.

We soon realize that we need to log into Airbnb to get the check in details for our house in Trinidad. It looks like it’s finally time to brave the Cuban internet service. First of all, we need to buy a wifi card. We head over to the main street and quickly run into our guide from the car tour 2 days ago. She affectionately recognizes Andrew as “father” and greets us warmly. We ask her about getting a wifi card and she literally walks us over to the shop and tells the shopkeeper to sell us a card. She also directs us to an old hotel as the nearest wifi access point.

We decide to log on using Andrew’s phone but can not get connected. A group of tourists ask us about the wifi and we direct them to a store to buy a card. Since we are planning on eating dinner in Plaza de San Francisco, we head over there to see if we can get a better connection. As soon as we arrive we see a group of teenagers huddled together, looking at their phones. Clearly, we’ve found the right place. When we attempt to connect again, the login page times out. We make multiple attempts and are able to get connected a few times, but each time Andrew’s phone freezes, probably due to trying to download too many emails at once. We are starting to get frustrated and eventually agree that if we can not connect in the next 30 minutes that we will have to give up and try again tomorrow morning.

After 30 more minutes of failed attempts we pull ourselves away and start looking for restaurant for dinner. We pick one at random and grab a table outside. We all order bottled water and large plates of food. I opt for the ropa vieja, which is quickly becoming my new favorite dish.

By 8:30pm we are heading back in for the night. We agree to meet up at 7am to try to log into the wifi one more time and then meet our driver at 7:30 for our trip to Trinidad. We are all looking forward to good night’s sleep.

Well, that escalated quickly.

Sunday, December 3rd 2017
Habana, Cuba and Valle de Vinales, Cuba

It’s 6:30am EDT and my alarm is going off. We are waking up extra early today to travel to Vinales. I am mostly packed up and only need a few minutes to get ready. I meet up with Laura and Andrew at 6:50am just as Manny announces they are out of coffee. We are all very bummed about this development and, also, slightly hungover. Given our 7:30am departure we have foregone a hot breakfast so I end up settling for beef jerky and bottled water.

By 7:20 Manny is rushing us out the door and into Bruno’s Volvo. It’s my turn to sit up front and I am secretly hoping that Bruno is not talkative. On the way out of Habana we make small talk in Spanish. I am holding my own, but then again, this conversation is not very sophisticated. I start to explain that we need to book a room for the night and Laura jumps in to help. We also explain that we would like to go horseback riding when we arrive and that we would like to go back to Habana at 11am tomorrow. Bruno repeats our requests back to us and, as soon as he’s clear, he jumps into action. He is talking into his cell phone at a speed that is at least 10 times as fast as he was just talking to me. After about 10 minutes of very intense conversation, he hangs up and announces that everything is taken care of. I like this guy!

The entire drive to Vinales will be approximately 3 hours, so far we’ve been on the road for less than 30 minutes. Laura and Andrew immediately fall asleep in the backseat, while I intently stare at the road and make several observations. First of all, the roads are in great condition and there are almost no other cars. I am reeling about how easy things are in Cuba; in any other country the whole morning would have been spent lugging bags around a crowded train station (come to think about it, I’ve barely even picked up my bag up at all since I’ve been here!). The next thing I notice is that Bruno is swerving a lot. It seems deliberate, but I still find it strange. The last thing I note is that there are all sorts of people standing on the side of the road whenever we go underneath an overpass. I think they may be bus stops, but there are no buildings or parking lots close by; I can’t figure out where all the people came from.

About halfway through the trip I pull out my bag of macadamia nuts for a snack. I ask Bruno if he wants some and he says that he’ll try just one. A few minutes later Bruno starts clearing his throat excessively. As we all sit in silence, Bruno continues to swerve down the highway while his throat noises increase. I frantically look in the backseat to find Laura and Andrew fast asleep. I am increasingly concerned that Bruno has a nut allergy, but I am also too scared to ask. I stare straight ahead while I silently formulate a plan for handling anaphylactic shock.

Eventually the flora thickens and we enter a more populated area. Bruno, between throat clearings, explains that we are in the main tobacco growing area. I try to ask a few polite questions about tobacco farming, but Bruno doesn’t really know much about it. Soon we exit the freeway and start driving through a small town. At one point Bruno tells me to move to backseat as he picks up another passenger who takes my place in the front. Fine, this guy can deal with Bruno’s nut allergy.

Soon we arrive at our casa particular in Vinales. We are only two blocks from the main road and the house is adorable. Bruno introduces us to our host, Amauri, who lives with his family in the front of the house. With substantially less fanfare than our previous host, he shows us our rooms. They are both single rooms with their own bathrooms located off the courtyard. The rooms are super clean and have AC units, so we are happy. Amauri is all business and quickly takes our passports for documentation and payment for one night’s stay. He offers us breakfast, but we decline on the basis that we are only in Vinales for one day and want to see as much as possible. He also explains that the horse tour company will come pick us up in one hour.

We quickly drop our bags and change into horseback riding clothes. We have 45 minutes left to grab a late breakfast and get back to the house. We walk directly to the main street and take a seat at the first cafe we find. I notice a large shirtless man repairing his classic car in the middle of the street and I feel like we are really in Cuba.

For brunch we all order americanos and Laura and Andrew get some version of eggs, bread and veggies. There is a menu item called “eggs and surprise”, which I order for myself. The surprise turns out to be extra bread. I make the observation that Cubans serve their bread extra crispy as I continually scratch up the roof of my mouth.

After brunch, we have time to make a quick lap through the open air crafts market next to our cafe. Andrew buys a broad brimmed sun hat for horseback riding and Laura buys some little wooden birds to bring home as gifts for friends and family.

When we arrive back at the house, Gabriella, our tour operator is already waiting for us. According to my iphone, we have 5 minutes to spare, but she is looking at us like we are late. I am beginning to wonder if Cuba has its own time zone that runs on EDT minus 10 minutes.

Gabriella explains that we can either follow her over to the horses or wait at the house and have the horses brought to us. We opt to follow her. For the next 30 minutes we follow Gabriella as she rides her electric scooter forward a few blocks and then waits for us to catch up. We end up crossing the entire town in this fashion. Eventually, we see horses!

When we approach the small ranch, we are greeted by a group of 20-something guys, all wearing cowboy boots. Gabriella introduces us to her “son”, named Yovani. They look nothing alike, but we all smile and nod. It’s explained that the entire tour is a minimum of 3 hours and there are multiple stopping points, where we can stay as long as we like. I feel like 3 hours seems a little long, but we do not argue with the horse madam. We are quickly escorted to our horses and Andrew wonders aloud if he is the only one unfamiliar with horseback riding. Laura and I silently nod “yes”. We are living up to our Texan stereotypes.

The tour starts on a long dirt road surrounded by a field of tobacco plants and incredibly bright sun. Yovani strikes up a conversation with me that quickly turns to politics. I proudly announce that I do not support Trump and that I think he is a dumbass. Yovani looks uncomfortable and tells me that I shouldn’t speak about my president that way. It immediately occurs to me that my good intentions may be doing more harm than good. I quickly change the subject.

After only 15 minutes, we arrive at our first stop. Yovani helps us off of our horses and introduces us to Rosana, who is going to show us around a coffee farm and then provide a rum and honey tasting. Rosana is incredibly enthusiastic and speaks perfect English with an awesome Caribbean accent. She explains the process of picking and drying coffee beans and then also tells us about the special honey bees in Cuba that live underground. Once we are sufficiently educated, Rosana shows us to a picnic table where she asks us to hold out our hands. She pours a small amount of honey into each of our palms and we all stare dumbfounded as the honey starts to congeal with sweat and horse dirt. We simultaneously make the decision that it’s best to just eat the honey.

Next Rosana explains the importance of honey to rum and that Cubans sometimes include a drop of honey in the bottom of their shot glasses. She asks if we would like to try and we nod enthusiastically. She pours us little shots, which we all drink immediately. Rosana points out a special rum cocktail that is for sale. Laura and Andrew seem on the fence, so I make the call to order a round. Rosana brings us our cocktails and a little band plays Guantanamera at our table. This place is a total tourist trap and we are eating it up!

Once we finish our drinks, we head back over to the horses and they all look the same! I tell Yovani through bursts of laughter that I can’t find my horse. I am the only one that thinks this is funny.

We ride for another 30 minutes until we arrive at a small farmhouse in a tobacco field. We are introduced to Dixon, who is the son of the owner of the farm. He shows us to a picnic table under an awning and gives a thorough explanation of how cigars are made. There are three type of leaves that are used to make cigars. They come from the top, middle and bottom of the plant. The leafs are cut from the plant and then cut again into a specific shape for cigars. They are then dried in large sheds and then soaked in special formula of water and honey. Two of the three leaves go into the center of the cigar and then the third leaf is used to wrap the the cigar. I was surprised to learn that the whole leaves are rolled into the cigar; I had imagined that they were chopped up at some point.

After his explanation, Dixon gives us a cigar to sample. When I politely decline, Dixon catches me off guard by telling me that it’s okay that I don’t smoke. He says that he doesn’t smoke either. I stare dumbly at him in silence for nearly a minute until he continues to explain that Cuban cigars are actually made for people that don’t smoke. This guy is good. As Dixon lays on the guilt, I counter with equal amounts of gratitude and eventually the conversation fizzles. Luckily Laura and Andrew are willing to try the sample and come to my rescue with high praise for Dixon’s cigars. On the way out, they both purchase a few cigars for later; I guess they really are good!

Soon we are heading back to the horses. Yovani asks if we would like to see a cave and we all say yes.

He takes us down a short foot path to the mouth of a large cave. We have to climb over some rocks and jump over a little stream to get into it. We are all super awkward in scaling the rocks, but eventually we get into the cave and are rewarded with some really awesome photos. Just as we are getting ready to walk back over to the horses, Yovani motions that we should follow him. He takes us through a very small crevice and into an extremely dark and narrow passageway. The pathway seems to go on forever and just as I am starting to panic, we exit out of the other side. As we walk back to the horses, we have to tip a small family who is sitting at the entrance to the foot trail. I guess they are the keepers of the cave.

For the next 45 minutes, we quietly ride through the valley and, eventually, up a very large hill. The scenery is amazing and we are surrounded by large pastures, filled with sleeping cows. Some of them have the weird, little birds perched on their backs; what a strange friendship.

Eventually, we reach the last stop, which is a lookout point that is also a bar. There is a large grill operating in full force and a handful of chickens and cats running around. We take a few minutes to appreciate the view and take pictures. We decide to hang out for a little bit and buy a round of beer for ourselves and Yovani. As we sit in the shade, Yovani shows us pictures of his kids and talks about life in Vinales. He says that he gets paid around 50 CUCs per month, which is about the amount that we will each pay for the afternoon.

Once we are done with our drinks, we begin the slow ride back. Multiple groups are heading back into town and our horses seem to be slowest. We are continually passed by other tour groups and Yovani is starting to look irritated. Around 5pm we are back at the ranch. We thank Yovani for showing us around and start the trek back into town. We are hot, tired and hungry. We make the decision to go to an early dinner.

When we get back to the main street all of the restaurants look the same. We pick the first one we see and get a table on their large front porch. We order a round of cold beer and start to peruse the menu. I am excited to find a dish called plato de carne and Andrew and Laura find equally exciting options. Dinner turns out to be great. It’s nice to be in the shade with ice cold beer. Also, the food tastes great.

After dinner we really want to go out but are also feeling very tired. We opt for quick cup of coffee at a small cafe across the street. There are these weird music videos playing on the TV by the bar and we can’t stop staring at them. I am just now realizing that I have not looked at a TV in nearly 4 days. We are all mesmerized.

After coffee, we agree to go back to our rooms for a quick fresh up before going out for the night. We’ve been told that people dance in the main square and we just need to stay up late enough to participate. Around 7pm we arrive at the main square. Nothing is going on yet, so we find a bar nearby and order a round of drinks. A little band is playing and as the sun sets the temperature starts to drop to an acceptable level.

Around 9pm the square is looking more active but there is no music and no dancing. We ask around and eventually it’s explained that dancing happens at the building at the end of the square called Centro Cultural Polo Montanez. We walk over and pay a small cover charge to go inside. We grab a table and Laura and I go up to the bar to get a round of drinks. The guys in front of us order a whole bottle of rum. We are intrigued. When it’s our turn we learn that a bottle of rum is only 15 CUCs. We think it makes sense, mathematically speaking, to order a whole bottle. When we get back to the table, the look on Andrew’s face suggests this going to be trouble.

As we start on our bottle, a live band starts to play. The dance hall is starting to fill up when we run into Yovani! I am overly excited to see our only friend in Vinales and he quickly introduces us to all of his friends. We invite them to share our rum and try to speak Spanish over the increasing volume of the band. At one point, one of Yovani’s friends wants to dance with me and I am a total mess. Our rum goes fast and, naturally, we buy another bottle. The rest of the night is blur of music, rum and dancing. Yovani’s friend suggests that we get married a few times and even though I am incredibly drunk, I politely refuse. I guess one dance will get you holy matrimony in Vinales. Things escalate quick here. 

We are only ready to leave when the bar closes. Our new friends want to hang out after hours, but Andrew sternly steers them in another direction. Meanwhile, Laura and I are stumbling home while hugging and petting stray cats.

As I am unlocking the door to my room I can not shake the feeling that we may have overdone it. It’s okay though, we’ll exit this town first thing tomorrow morning. Michele out!

There are no Chinese.

Saturday, December 2nd, 2017
Habana, Cuba

It’s 8:15am EDT and I am waking up from a second night of terrible sleep. I quickly get ready for the day and meet up with Laura and Andrew at approximately 8:50am. They did not sleep well either.

By 8:55am Manny is cheerfully serving us an enormous breakfast spread. We spend most of breakfast trying to figure out our plan for the next 2 days. We would like to go to Vinales tomorrow morning, but we need a driver. We also need somewhere to stay. On Monday we need somewhere to stay in Habana before we leave for Trinidad on Tuesday morning. These are a lot of logistics to work out with no Internet and a poor grasp of Spanish.

When Manny arrives to clear our breakfast, Laura starts the conversation. Manny speaks very slowly to us and uses lots of hand gestures. He assures us that he will have a driver pick us up tomorrow morning and take us to Vinales and the same driver will bring us back on Sunday. Also, our same rooms are available on Sunday night, so we can stay here again. The nightly rate is even discounted, since we are booking directly! Manny also assures us that our driver can find us a place to stay in Vinales. This entire conversation took place in Spanish and we are 80% sure of what just happened.

We start our day off at the snack stand down the street. A small child sells me 2 1.5 liter bottles of water. Laura and Andrew think that I am acting paranoid about running out of water and I have to admit they have a point.

Our next stop is the Museo de Revolucion. Having learned about the revolution in Cuba in middle school, I am pretty excited to see this. We wait in a short line and have to pay the tourist entry fee, which is totally fine with us. It takes me a few minutes to realize that we need to check our bags at the front desk, but eventually we are all checked in and ready to enter the exhibit.

The inside of the museum is pretty basic. Especially compared to the outside, which is literally a palace (the museum is housed in the old Presidential Palace, where the Presidents lived before Castro took over and moved into the Palace of the Revolution, which is a much less ornate building). We walk through multiple galleries featuring blown up photographs and the story of the Cuban revolution. There is a big focus on Che Guevara, Fidel Castro, Camilo Cienfuegos and Jose Marti. Parts of the explanation emphasize America’s role in creating a trade embargos, our attempts at assassinating Castro and the Bay of Pigs. I am feeling a little uncomfortable, but continue silently through the galleries. After the story of the revolution is complete, we find a few more rooms dedicated to artifacts, including an old transmitter used to communicate with Russia during the Cold War. I think this is particularly cool. There are also a handful of statues and a large cut out of a boat with a mural of different people painted across it. I mainly take pictures of empty rooms and windows; the early afternoon light in here is stunning.

After the museum, we head back over to Plaza Viejo. Our plan is to find coffee, exchange more money and grab some lunch. As soon as we find the money exchange, Laura announces that she left her passport back in her room. This is fine with me, as I secretly wanted to refill my water anyways. Back to where we started! As we weave through the narrow streets we are suddenly overtaken by tourists. It looks like the cruise ships have arrived.

Once we grab Laura’s passport, we walk back to Plaza Viejo. On the way, we find a small bank that has no line for money exchange. I wait outside for Laura and Andrew and try not to look too closely to street performers. I strategically move back and forth from one side of the street to the other because I don’t have any bills small enough for tipping. I feel bad, because it’s literally a circus out here. There are women dancing on stilts, a man singing opera in a wheelchair and lady with a large cat that is wearing a small dress. By the time Laura and Andrew emerge from the bank, I am ready for lunch.

We do a quick lap around the plaza and eventually settle on a little restaurant with balcony seating that overlooks the square. We are seated right away and the sun is punishing. I am still committed to coffee, though and order a hot Americano. The server looks at me like I’m nuts and I really can’t blame her. For lunch, we all order sandwiches. It’s time for our first real Cuban sandwiches!

The sandwiches are good, but not as good as Cuban sandwiches in LA. I can tell the bread is fresh and appreciate that the cheese is extra thick, but it's just not as flavorful as I am used to. After lunch we are tired and bordering on sun stroke. We head back to our rooms for a siesta.

Around 4pm we reconvene for our evening activities. Our first order of business is to take a city tour in a classic car. We walk over to the cab area and quickly make friends with one of the business owners, who affectionately tells Andrew that he looks like her father. I think this is a compliment, but Laura can’t stop laughing. Andrew seems mildly irritated. We pick out a pink convertible for our tour, negotiate the driver down to one hour, and we are off!

I have to admit that I had my doubts, but this tour turns out to be totally awesome. The breeze is cool and we easily cruise through more neighborhoods that I can count. I am surprised by the lack of traffic, but quickly realize this is a result of major restrictions on cars (on our first day, our tour guide told us that cars can cost as much as houses!). At one point, our tour guide points out that we are in Chinatown, but says “there are no Chinese”. When Laura asks why not she replies, more slowly, “there are no Chinese”. The whole car is confused and we all laugh heartily.

Halfway through the tour our driver stops at Plaza de la Revolucion. There is a large tower-shaped monument in the middle, which is a tribute to Jose Marti. Across from the memorial, large outlines of Che Guevara and Camilo Cienfuegos grace the sides of 2 government buildings. Most of the plaza is empty space; later I’ll learn this was an important gathering area during the revolution and, at one point, Fidel Castro addressed over 1 million people here.

On the way back into town we pass a large hospital, which has a picture of Che on the front. We also stop at Parque John Lennon and take pictures, with the famous statue (Cuba has a weird fascination with The Beatles and we’ll continue to hear Beatles covers throughout our trip). On the way back into town we drive down a quaint street that is lined by large houses. Laura asks if this is where wealthy people live and our guide starts laughing hysterically. She manages to sputter that these are not houses; they are embassies.

The last leg of our drive takes us down the Malacon, which is the street that runs next to the ocean. There is no coastline, just a tall seawall which is only blocking some of the incoming waves. The sun is starting to set and I am getting some amazing photos.

After our tour, it’s time for Laura’s official birthday dinner! Earlier Andrew set a reservation at Havana 61, which is one of the best restaurants in town. We arrive right on time and are seated immediately (I am loving the punctuality of Cuba!). We start out with a round of their signature drink, which is a canchanchara. It tastes like a sour mojito and is delicious! We order a few appetizers and our entrees. I have the ropa vieja, which does not disappoint. We get a few more rounds of drinks and thoroughly enjoy the food, drinks and conversation. Andrew has budgeted 100 CUCs for all 3 of us to have a nice birthday dinner and, despite our best efforts, the bill only comes out to 52. Damn, Cuba!

After dinner, we decide to take some of our personal rum stash to the Malacon to walk by the water and, possibly, socialize with other people. When we arrive the path is darker and emptier than we expected. We have a few conversations with people who are passing by but they are just trying to sell us stuff. Eventually we leave.

On the way back, we pass an adorable little rooftop bar, which is right next to our Airbnb. We duck in for a quick beer and are greeted by a very friendly server. He quickly brings us 3 Bucaneros and 3 chilled glasses. He sets the glasses on the table and then pours each beer in a way that the stream of beer hits the upper part of the side of the glass and then runs down into the glass without creating any foam. These Texans stare in amazement and simultaneously comment on his excellent pouring abilities. This guy is amazing.

Just as our first beer is done a little band starts to play and we have to order another round. One round turns into 4 and we are having so much fun that I swear I could stay all night. Around midnight, we finally pull ourselves away and head back in for the night. Laura and I still have energy, however, so we pour ourselves little glasses of rum. Our conversation quickly turns into a heated debate about the girl scouts, which only ends when I stomp off to bed. It’s okay though, heated debates over one-too-many is a vacation tradition for us!

Tomorrow we will head over to Vinales and I am already excited!